A really good decision …

After returning to work just over two weeks ago and being consumed each and every day by the most horrific guilt at leaving Luca (albeit in the most competent care) at home and spending only 2 or 3 hours a day with him, I made a decision to make a change.

I have recently learnt that there are two kinds of mothers: those who are successfully able to balance a demanding career and the demanding job of being a mum and those who are unable to handle the pressure of a high-stress job and still be the kind of mother they aspire to be. Now, there’s nothing wrong with either kind of mum at all. In fact, I (having now realized that I fall into the latter category) have the utmost respect for those mums who manage both. I am just not one of them and I think that in realizing that fact I have saved myself from a lifetime of regret and misery. I have had my fair share of lectures about what I should and shouldn’t do, what’s right and what’s wrong and I have come to this conclusion: every mother is different, with different needs and abilities and no one is in the position to judge a mother for any decision she makes when it comes to her child. A mother knows what her child (and she) needs.

I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off of my shoulders. Today I got home and told Luca that at the end of November (when my notice period ends) we will start going to Aqua Tots, Baby Gym and more … he gave me the most gorgeous gummy smile yet and at that exact moment I knew in my heart that I had just made a really good decision.


5 thoughts on “A really good decision …

  1. Good for you Nicki. I feel like you’ve made a very wise decision, and like you said, there will be no regret when you look back in 20 years time.

    I heard someone say the other day that not one person has ever lay on their death bed & said “I wish I had spent more time working or I wish I had made more money”, yet they will always say, “I wish I had spent more time with my family” … kinda makes you think bout what’s really important in this life hey!!

    Enjoy your days with your teeeny tot 🙂


  2. Awww fabulous news my hunny! I am so proud of you! It is not an easy decision because today we are expected to just suck it up and do it all. A happy mommy makes a happy, SECURE baby! It is def the right decision for your family and like you said you will get advice but stick to your gut instinct! Love you and Luca!

  3. i am not the kind of mum who can focus on high-demand job and still feel like i’m doing everything and the best for my Kid.

    which is (partly) why I’ve only chosen to return (actually get my first real job) after two years of being home with him.

    I’ve eased us into it – he’s been going to a daymother/playgroup since he was 9 months old, first for two days a week and now for three days a week. and when i go to work full time, so will he go to daycare full time.

    luckily i have a job (and a boss) that understands that i’m a mommy first, and is prepared to give me flexibility as long as all the work gets done.

    So it’s basically up to me to manage work/kid now. It’s going to be a new experience, but I think it will be good.

    So well done you, for making the right decision for you both. xx

  4. Hey you!

    Congrats! You are a very lucky mommy to be able to make this decision and I am holding thumbs that you will get that “morning” jobby 😎

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